Articles

 
Toddler Emailing Mam’s Boss While She Blacks Out on Couch

Toddler Emailing Mam’s Boss While She Blacks Out on Couch

Don't worry if you're a sleep deprived parent whose childless boss expects you to maintain full productivity while minding a toddler on your own, they can help you stay on top of things while you sleep...

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Ughhhhh: Imagine Shifting Someone You Just Met in a Pub

Ughhhhh: Imagine Shifting Someone You Just Met in a Pub

As utterly revolting and criminally unhygienic as it sounds in the middle of the corona crisis, one day soon Corkonians will once again swap saliva in public and nobody will bat an eyelid....

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Dollar and Euro Plummet Against Toilet Roll

Dollar and Euro Plummet Against Toilet Roll

In another disastrous day of trading in currency markets worldwide both the euro and dollar have plummeted against the toilet roll.

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PROC’s Lockdown Survival Tips For Exhausted Parents

PROC’s Lockdown Survival Tips For Exhausted Parents

Running out of ideas and sanity quickly during the lockdown? Next time you get more than 25 seconds to yourself, read our top tips to not having your children taken from you by the High Court....

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Corona Virus and Carbon Footprint: More Reasons To Never Leave Cork

Corona Virus and Carbon Footprint: More Reasons To Never Leave Cork

Even if you don't believe in climate change or you just don't give a hoot, your carbon footprint and the Chinese snots are great excuses to stay in Cork

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A List For Mick

A List For Mick

We are being softened up for a Fianna Fáil/Fine Gael coalition so it's a good time to make a list of what Cork expects if Micheál Martin becomes Taoiseach...

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How a United Ireland Could Herald A People’s Republic

How a United Ireland Could Herald A People’s Republic

If Nordies are to be persuaded to vote to join a country that is Europe's most capital-centric nation, then the Republic's toxic Dublin bias must be eradicated....

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Valentines Day Poem To Cork

Valentines Day Poem To Cork

We all have a deep, deep love of Cork, it really is the berries, From its beaches and its rivers, from its islands to its ferries....

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A Children’s Tale: Cork’s Magical Musical Hall

A Children’s Tale: Cork’s Magical Musical Hall

Four years ago the sod was turned on Cork's event centre - children born that day are now old enough to understand the story of two princes, a princess and a big ugly field...

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Election Issues: End Open Borders?

Election Issues: End Open Borders?

Cork's borders are not being policed. How many more Kerrymen can Cork be expected to take in? We address the real issues effecting the People's Republic...

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Why is Cork So Daycint at Science?

Why is Cork So Daycint at Science?

After another massive Cork win in the BT Young Scientist competition, the ninth in 25 years. As the league leaders, isn't it time the competition was held in Cork?

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Managing Expectations: 2020 Predictions - Part 2

Managing Expectations: 2020 Predictions - Part 2

Brexit "paradise" to lure Ireland back into Commonwealth, RTE to be bought by Netflix and managing our football championship expectations...

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Peak Hoggie: 2020 Predictions - Part 1

Peak Hoggie: 2020 Predictions - Part 1

We look at what’s in store for the People’s Republic in 2020.

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Desperate Candidates’ Guide to Cork By-Election

Desperate Candidates’ Guide to Cork By-Election

Frustrated with the dominance of civil war parties despite the homeless crisis and a shambolic health service? Read our guide to pimping your vote and be in with a chance of winning a Dáil seat...

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Cork Finally Admits It’s Really Bad At Something: Robberies

Cork Finally Admits It’s Really Bad At Something: Robberies

Last year an 80 year old famously ran three young raiders out of a bookies in Glanmire, while on Friday night 100 feenagers attempting to rob a sports shop were humiliated by a handful of Gardaí...and their own stupidity.....

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Unsung Heads of D’Jazz

Unsung Heads of D’Jazz

Bleary eyed bar staff, knob twiddling sound engineers, ticket blood hounds, and cranky taxi drivers - without them there'd be no jazz!

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