Oh ya... Get your phone out now.
You were queuing.
*Tap tap *
Ya, turn NFC on
Still no workie?
Where's your wallet.
Oh OK... Bottom of your man bag.
Try another card you say?
Hand's over a tenner.
Enjoy you frothy fruppacino, with chocolate frosting and marshmallow.
Now go find a corner and fucking die already you complete artard.
Everyone is recommending revolut…no thanks