Dublin Roasted

3rd Jul 2007

Cork 3-20 Dublin 0-15
Finbarr Barry

Not totally sure of the throw in time of the Cork-Dublin game last Saturday I sent a dedicated Cork fan an enquiring text about 11am that morning.

The reply summed up the occasion: Feen its already over but they'll be going through the motions at half 3.

Travelling to Dublin for such a relatively minor event was never on the cards for a member of the Peoples Republic of Cork, and thankfully many of you were spared the journey north to support the Rebels as the 9,000 who filled Parnell Park were mainly exiles living in Dublin who have had time to acclimatise to the woes of the east coast den of iniquity.

Spot the irony

FALSE HOPE
A few close encounters with Kilkenny in the winter league and a bunch of under age cups have given Dubliners the impression that their county has finally begun to crawl from the shadows of ineptitude and embarrassment in the basic fundamentals of gaelic culture.

Natives of the capital had nothing to cheer about as Cork arrived, disembarked, destroyed and departed barely out of breath. The Rebels sliced and diced the boys in blue into sliothar sized balls of humiliation that were then buried in the turf at Parnell Park and it'll take a very brave Dub to attempt a resurrection.

MUNSTER NOSTALGIA
It's funny to think what might have been if the GAA Disciplinary dictatorship in Dublin had not issued nonsensical bans against three of Cork's star players. In the Munster semi an inexperienced full back and goalkeeper leaked five goals.

On Saturday the full strength combination of Sully and ”gie leaked none while Cork's forwards managed to maintain their three goal tally. Draw your own conclusions.

STILL ROCKIN
The protection Cork full back Diarmuid O'Sullivan offers his club mate's net is now a critical asset to the Rebel's chances of taking the All Ireland title from Kilkenny. The use of girth to prevent forwards in possession from moving towards goal is a fine and rarely lauded art that Sully has mastered to perfection.

With fickle referees often inclined to give the forward the benefit of the doubt against "a man with a reputation" defending the twenty-one yard line is hurling's equivalent of Russian roulette.

A child of hope struggles

If the official sees too much arm tangling it's rarely anything except a free right in front of the posts. The Rock's bulk, power and agility allows Cork to present a virtual battering ram to opposing full forwards whose over enthusiasm to circumnavigate the blockade invariably ends in failure.

When Dublin finally made some space towards the end of Saturday's mismatch and fired at Donal ”g the angle had been reduced sufficiently by O'Sullivan to allow his keeper to make a mesmerising save.

BEING NICE
To be fair (and we're obviously all that) to the capital it's true to say that one or two Dublin hurlers can play a bit.

No disrespect intended to the great hurling institution that is Brian Dillons up in Mayfield, but if some of the pluckier Dublin lads moved south and fancied their chances swinging a stick in the city, they wouldn't be out of place on the club's Junior B subs bench on a Sunday morning.

And in a world where gender borders are vaporising, the camogie mad girls over at Glen Rovers might be able to find a corner forward slot for these Dublin lads if they want to rest their Cork stars.

HOPE and GUILT
It's hard to see hope for Dublin as a county. There's talk of under age success and another Leinster minor title win against Kilkenny on Saturday offers some optimism for the future. At worst, perhaps their roasting defeats to Cork won't be as embarrassingly colossal down the line.

It is important to stress that you shouldn't feel guilty about having a few chuckles about the state of GAA in Dublin because the reality is that it is the best the Dubs ought to get away with. Behind the ball hopping and soft digs about woeful standards of the national game in the capital lies a problem far deeper than being trounced by fourteen points by Cork.

All over the island the population is moving towards urban centres - particularly the eastern seaboard - meaning the GAA must move towards a more urban model in developing gaelic games as the rural population declines.

President Nickey Brennan recognises this and Central Council are already implementing cash schemes to improve club facilities in major urban centres - namely Dublin - but to date there has been little improvement from the feeble county and its one million strong population.

If the best this mass of people can produce is the pathetic performance we sat through last Saturday then Corkonians who lap up their hurling and football will start to get raw very soon if this shambles continues. Why flog a dead horse when you can ride a thorough bred?