Dollar and Euro Plummet Against Toilet Roll
In another disastrous day of trading in currency markets worldwide both the euro and dollar have plummeted against the toilet roll.
The rise in the value of the toilet roll is expected to result in the central banks of many countries, including Ireland, to consider adopting the toilet roll as their country's official currency.
With a single roll of 180 sheet tissue now changing hands for up to €80 and the double ply equivalent soaring to €110, hedge funds managers have been pegging clients’ investments to the bog roll in a hope to avoid a major dip in value.
“We need to get behind this quickly,” said economist Roger O’Gargle, “there’s going to be an awful lot of shit to wipe up when this is all over”.
.jpg) |
| Guess who just shat himself |
Grand Parade Panic Terror Frenzy Rampage Fear
Posted on Nov 23rd, 2020Quick! Get into your panic room, take your cyanide tablets and make your last social media post because noisy young fellas on skateboards are having a bit of craic on Grand Parade...
Cranes, Planes and Mark Keane
Posted on Nov 20th, 2020He dominated the Cork skyline against Kerry, the Aussie rules Rebel can Ronan McCarthy and the boys lift us out of a glum winter?
Cork Knock Kerry Out Cold
Posted on Nov 9th, 2020Cork footballers beat the Kingdom at Páirc Uí Chaoimh in a soggy slugfest that has left Kerry reeling...
Guide to Recreating the Trip to Tipp at Home
Posted on Oct 30th, 2020Have your own virtual Thurles experience at home with our top "tipps"...
De Jazz That Never Was
Posted on Oct 23rd, 2020We should be gearing up for the de jazz instead of NPHET’s No Craic weekend...
Grand Parade Panic Terror Frenzy Rampage Fear
Cranes, Planes and Mark Keane
Cork Knock Kerry Out Cold
Guide to Recreating the Trip to Tipp at Home
De Jazz That Never Was
Calls for National Alzheimer’s Screening Programme after FF Storm Election
Top 10 Cute Kerry Hoors
Vote For A New State - Part 1
Clonakilty Visa Requirements
