Galvin Takes Up Dentistry

14th Jun 2010

Kerry & GAA Officialdom 1-15
Cork 1-14

Well done Kerry.

Long gone are the days when Gaelic football was played with honour and fairness. Kerry have managed to bend the rules so far that they now play with 21 men. Fifteen in gold and green, three in black and four in white. Fair play to them.

Galvin attacks Eoin Cadogan who intercepted his pass.

How to sum it up? No, not the ludicrous sending off of Graham Canty when he tried to rise the ball while Colm Cooper performed a super-camp Ronaldo style dive over the Bantry man's thigh.

The best synopsis of the calamitous or possibly even devious conspiracy between Kingdom and officialdom lay in another tirade against Graham Canty as he sheparded the ball out of play with Kieran Donaghy climbing over his back.

Donaghy's leg clearly knocked the ball out of play for a Cork kick-out. The umpire had a microscopic view of the incident. He was literally IN the incident. The result? A forty-five to Kerry in front of the posts duly dispatched by Brian Sheehan.

Even the cameras showed there was no ambiguity. We don't need to remind Cork fans of what the winning margin was but Cork fans might like to be reminded that this was the same umpire that was consulted by the ref to send Canty off.

An incident in the first half typified the kid gloves that are required to tackle anyone in green and gold. Cooper collects a lofted ball in front of the Blackrock End on the covered stand side. Kissane and O'Sullivan surrounded him and without touching Cooper blocked his way to the Cork goal. Nothing illegal. Cooper realsining he is trapped performs a stand-alone disco spasm. Free in.

Later on Galvin claws at Cadogan's mouth offering some unwelcome aggressive dental treatment. The referee stands four yards away gaping at it like a nervous child in a waiting room. No free. Galvin should have walked.

All the panellists in the country can talk about Cooper's skill, Ó Sé's leadership or Galvin's horrific tattoos but the difference is they're Irish and we're from Cork. Donaghy and Cooper are the most protected species in the world. No other animal enjoys such round the clock security from predators.

That's the difference. Congratulations to Kerry. It's not their fault that officials are so susceptible to their codology. Cork made the mistake of trying to be as cynical and negative as Kerry thinking they too might get away with it. Not so.

Don't go on strike. We'll whistle the shit out of it for the slightest thing if you do.

That's the message.