Jokes thread......

[Stromovka]

 

[Skybluebarry1]

A gay man was rushed to hospital when a bizarre sex game went wrong leaving him with 6 toy horses stuck up his arse,

-Doctors describe his condition as stable.


Arsene Wenger,Ales Ferguson and Pep Guardiola all die in acar crash.


They get to Heaven & St Peter says,

"God wants to ask you a question and, if he likes you, you can sit with him to watch the grand final".


God to Wenger..."what do you believe in?"


"I believe in looking after the players well-being on and off the field"


God says “that’s good, you can sit on my left.”


God to Guardiola “what do you believe in”


“I believe in courage, honour and you can achieve anything if you put your mind to it.”


God says “that’s good, you can sit on my right...”


God to Ferguson. . . “what do you believe in...”




“I believe you're sitting in my chair !”

 

[Hallbopping]

 

[Skybluebarry1]

 

[Skybluebarry1]

Two Italian nuns are riding their rickety old bikes down the back streets of old Rome late one afternoon.
As it turns dusk, the increasing darkness starts making one of the nuns a little nervous.
She leans over to the other and says, "You know, I've never come this way before."


The other nun replies, "It's the cobblestones."

 

[Dr. Aaoouh]

 

[Great-Bit-O-Stuff]

 

[Stromovka]

View attachment 41277

School ain't what it used to be.

 

[Meridian]

 

[Skybluebarry1]

A man and woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.
They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands.
Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the man slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman acted unconcerned.
The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table. Still, the woman
appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware her dining companion had disappeared.
The waitress went over to the table and said to the woman,
"Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table."

The woman calmly looked up at her and said, "No, he didn't.

He just walked in.