Cork Lad Thinks About Cork Every 3 Seconds

[de mange]

Is Toosexy, Conal?

Cork Lad Thinks About Cork Every 3 Seconds
April 10, 2014

Conal Lynch, a proud Cork native, struggled to concentrate in work this afternoon, WWN can exclusively reveal.
Sitting on the third floor looking out over Harcourt St in the Nation’s capital Conal thought to himself ‘it’s no Princes St’.
The 26-year-old accountant found himself growing ever more restless throughout his working day, his head filled with thoughts of a drive out to Inchydoney, a Cafe Gusto sandwich and a pint in The Bodega.
To the untrained eye it appeared Conal was doing a solid day’s work but upon closer inspection it could be seen that just beneath his ashen-faced silence Conal was obsessing over his native Cork at a rate of once every three seconds.
When a co-worker asked if Conal wanted to go out for lunch he responded ‘yeah, of Cork, eh, I mean of course’ such was the Cork-shaped fog surrounding his brain.
This all consuming fixation rendered him useless to his co-workers as he stared longingly at his screensaver – the Cork coat of arms. The effect of being so engrossed in all things Cork while stuck up in Dublin is akin to a mild stroke leaving Conal bereft of movement, stuck in a dangerous inert state.
As his will to live in Dublin visibly drained from him he reached a momentous decision: he was going to take the Friday off and make a real weekend out of it back home.

 

[Proud Dubliner]

Thats Corkonians fot you. I bet he still gets his Ma to do his laundry for him.

 

[collapsedfaceman]

Admin

the title was the name of the website the article came from you eejits, and that site does sarcasm really, really well so posters might like to see other articles there, hence the thread title

I'm beginning to think you have it in for me at this stage, or else Finbarr has frazzled your brains as well as his own

cool story brother

 

[Goatz]

There should be PROC underpants.

 

[D'oriel]

WWN can sometimes produce funny articles.
This isn't one of them.

The majority of the articles are just trying far too hard to be The Onion, and failing miserably. Not least because the majority of The Onion articles have at the centre a reasonable commentary on pertinent social trends, fashions and observations.

 

[collapsedfaceman]

anything laughing at 'up the rebels/real capital/ive tanora in me veins, like' ejjitry is hilarious.

 

[Proud Dubliner]

anything laughing at 'up the rebels/real capital/ive tanora in me veins, like' ejjitry is hilarious.

You could have added in Tripe and Drisheen, Sean Og is a legend bullshit as well.

 

[Some user]

WWN can sometimes produce funny articles.
This isn't one of them.

The majority of the articles are just trying far too hard to be The Onion, and failing miserably. Not least because the majority of The Onion articles have at the centre a reasonable commentary on pertinent social trends, fashions and observations.

The Onion is great but it produces a lot of meh stuff too just like every production house and WWN is one. I like Waterford Whispers News although I don't actually visit the site but when people recommend stories they are usually good. I got a chuckle out of this one but I think its really cantankerous of people to expect every single article to be a gem.

I also think its really funny when my fellow Corkonians get offended at people just making light of a stereotype. I'm delighted this is what others think of us. So many counties hate where they are from or just look at Dubin. Its like shooting fish in a barrel when it comes to drugs, crime and other grime.

 

[Eoin]

WWN can sometimes produce funny articles.
This isn't one of them.

The majority of the articles are just trying far too hard to be The Onion, and failing miserably. Not least because the majority of The Onion articles have at the centre a reasonable commentary on pertinent social trends, fashions and observations.

Ah most of the stuff they do is funny in fairness.

If you want a really shite parody website check out wunderground.ie

 

[Bunk]

WWN can sometimes produce funny articles.
This isn't one of them.

The majority of the articles are just trying far too hard to be The Onion, and failing miserably. Not least because the majority of The Onion articles have at the centre a reasonable commentary on pertinent social trends, fashions and observations.

I'd agree that it's hit and miss, and that it's trying to ape The Onion. The bit I've bolded in the quote is a bit unfair, IMO.

The Onion is one of the most popular sites on the internet. You'd imagine they have a rather sizable staff of researchers / interns, as well as established writers, and access to a huge pool of freelancers submitting stuff to them every day. There's no reason for The Onion not to be right on top of everything.

Waterford Whispers is a handful of people, at most, and to be fair to them they publish something new every day, and although they don't always get it totally right, they publish very few articles that are utter shit.

If you want a really shite parody website check out wunderground.ie

Wunderground is awful, mostly because the scene they parody is ridiculous enough in its own right.