That is quite an impressive number of misrepresentation and bias to have shoehorned into one post.
BTW, the legal profession isn't self regulated.
The notion that the ring to a fair trial is " Alice in wonderland stuff" just shows that you don't understand the rule of law and you've never read Alice in Wonderland.
I get your yearning to protect the murky profession but society or the tax payers should suffer as a consequence of some ideal of a fair trial.