So, seeing as my last posts on this message board were over four week ago, and they involved the subject of depression. I decided that when my account was back up I would post about this subject. This is not the most cheerful subject I know but if it helps someone directly on here, or helps someone indirectly by someone here asking the question,” Are you okay?”, then it will be worth it.
I've suffered from depression for thirteen years to varying degrees ranging from making me attempt suicide once and half heartily another time to it having no grip over me. I’ve had some very good stretches but I’ve also had some dark, dark days when I just wanted it all to end and disappear.
It's not an easy thing to go through for the person it is affecting or an easy thing to admit you have, BUT it is not something to hide or be ashamed about. Talking does help but I needed to go from the top floor to the ground floor. I’ve had it described to me that not talking about it is like a balloon expanding, and it being like a weight around your neck. From my experience medication is not the only option. My experience is it made me feel worse than I already was and after six months I decided to stop taking it.
Also depression is not sadness/being sad. If it were that simple it would be much easier to address than it is. Depression is neither sadness nor happiness; it is a feeling of emptiness or "nothing" and not being able to explain why you feel like you do. Yes, it can obviously be mad worse if you are having a bad day and things aren’t going well.
Also the feeling that you need to hide all sharp objects on a person suffering from depression is a bit of a generalisation. The way I've felt some days, getting out of bed was hard to do, the last thing I want to do is do myself or someone else harm with a knife or anything like that.
I have been asked the question”What have you to be sad about?” That’s the thing I don't have anything to be sad about, I actually have a good life and things for the most part have been good, and people worse off than me have actual reasons to be down and pissed off.
The old Irish attitude which has in my opinion contributed to the problem of depression/suicide of it not been the done thing to show emotion, I believe is a factor in the male suicide rate in particular which is far too high. We as a nation need to stop trying to pretend it isn't a problem or not as bad as we think it is. If someone you knew had cancer would you help and support them? I’ve no doubt you would, so why not mental health?
Well said Chance. I suffer from it myself, the worst thing about being so far from home is that when it hits there's nobody here to pick me up again.
How are you feeling now?
I get what you mean about the medication too, it doesn't work for everybody (although you'll get somebody on here in a min saying it's just a chemical imbalance in the brain so how could they not work?) Not all depression is chemical..
Very articulate post, Chance. Know quite a few people with it, all different people in their own right. But, one thing seems important, that they all have someone to talk to about it, day or night. Very best of luck to you.
Dark Spectral Transference, or DST. It occurs in old houses and in particular Corporation housing. Worst case scenario is Spontaneous Human Combustion SHC, but more often its depression. No one gets the Priest in anymore or keep Holy water in the house. So cases have escalated over the last 10 years.
I wouldn't be surprised if the gaff I live in had a few people kick the bucket before I moved in. Tis here for years and years like.
Maybe ghosts and poltergeists don't cause depression and I'm just rambling. A handy trick anyway is to bless yourself at 6pm for the Angeles. Shur it couldn't do any harm.
All the best Chance.
Goats.
It's strange that a simple 'How are you?' seems so difficult to say. But as I'm sure you know it's because people either don't understand depression or are afraid of making you feel worse, as though asking someone how their repairing broken leg is will make the pain come back.
Talking helps, and I suppose you have to find the right people around you to do that.
It's brave to come on here and talk about it the way you have, and it's a worthwhile post.
Depression and my battle with it
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