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  #11  
Old 18-10-2019, 11:13 AM
Lostmeringtopaddypower Lostmeringtopaddypower is offline
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Location: In the corner with a big lump of meat
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Originally Posted by jeepers View Post
They're still making you go to Africa?
My crowd refused to let me go to Nigeria last month. You're too valuable, they said. I was willing to give it a lash.
What kinda pussies are they?

Where were you supposed to go?

Abuja or Lagos?

If a man can get through Lagos the rest of life is just pure gravy.
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  #12  
Old 18-10-2019, 11:20 AM
jeepers jeepers is offline
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Originally Posted by Lostmeringtopaddypow er View Post
What kinda pussies are they?

Where were you supposed to go?

Abuja or Lagos?

If a man can get through Lagos the rest of life is just pure gravy.
If it was just Abuja, it would have been grand. There was a four hour car journey to the east. I'm not as translucently white as a ginger norrie, but I don't exactly look local in Nigeria, so the option was either that we blast through the road blocks and hope that whitey here doesn't get hit by debris, or drive normally and hope that our security has been sufficiently well paid to return fire rather than handing me over. Our global H&S lad liked neither option, so I'm going to Lapland instead.
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  #13  
Old 18-10-2019, 11:31 AM
Lostmeringtopaddypower Lostmeringtopaddypower is offline
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I travelled overland from Lagos to a kip called Osogbo.

5 hour journey each way.

4 lads in front in a jeep with machine guns, the same in a jeep behind us.
8 machine guns.

As we were going along the "roads", I saw things that no norrie has ever seen.

At one stage there was a truck in front of us that wouldn't get out of our way.

There were no windows in the truck.

One of the lads in the front jeep took out a whip and started lashing the guy driving the truck. All this was happening as we are going about a hundred miles an hour and trying to dodge the craters in the road.

And the hotel we had to stay in overnight in Osogbo?

Oh dear lord in heaven.

The only thing you can do in Nigeria is get drunk and hope you make it back to the airport in 1-2 pieces.
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  #14  
Old 18-10-2019, 11:41 AM
CJ Poogan CJ Poogan is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 1,953
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lostmeringtopaddypow er View Post
I travelled overland from Lagos to a kip called Osogbo.

5 hour journey each way.

4 lads in front in a jeep with machine guns, the same in a jeep behind us.
8 machine guns.

As we were going along the "roads", I saw things that no norrie has ever seen.

At one stage there was a truck in front of us that wouldn't get out of our way.

There were no windows in the truck.

One of the lads in the front jeep took out a whip and started lashing the guy driving the truck. All this was happening as we are going about a hundred miles an hour and trying to dodge the craters in the road.

And the hotel we had to stay in overnight in Osogbo?

Oh dear lord in heaven.

The only thing you can do in Nigeria is get drunk and hope you make it back to the airport in 1-2 pieces.
No worse than harbour view road on a friday night
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  #15  
Old 18-10-2019, 11:48 AM
Bandon Langer Bandon Langer is offline
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 7,113
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lostmeringtopaddypow er View Post
I travelled overland from Lagos to a kip called Osogbo.

5 hour journey each way.

4 lads in front in a jeep with machine guns, the same in a jeep behind us.
8 machine guns.

As we were going along the "roads", I saw things that no norrie has ever seen.

At one stage there was a truck in front of us that wouldn't get out of our way.

There were no windows in the truck.

One of the lads in the front jeep took out a whip and started lashing the guy driving the truck. All this was happening as we are going about a hundred miles an hour and trying to dodge the craters in the road.

And the hotel we had to stay in overnight in Osogbo?

Oh dear lord in heaven.

The only thing you can do in Nigeria is get drunk and hope you make it back to the airport in 1-2 pieces.

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  #16  
Old 18-10-2019, 11:49 AM
Mike Strutter Mike Strutter is offline
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 1,644
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What about the beef............
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  #17  
Old 18-10-2019, 12:31 PM
jeepers jeepers is offline
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Location: livin' for the lotto
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Originally Posted by Bandon Langer View Post
Lol
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  #18  
Old 18-10-2019, 12:32 PM
jeepers jeepers is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: livin' for the lotto
Posts: 13,983
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lostmeringtopaddypow er View Post
I travelled overland from Lagos to a kip called Osogbo.

5 hour journey each way.

4 lads in front in a jeep with machine guns, the same in a jeep behind us.
8 machine guns.

As we were going along the "roads", I saw things that no norrie has ever seen.

At one stage there was a truck in front of us that wouldn't get out of our way.

There were no windows in the truck.

One of the lads in the front jeep took out a whip and started lashing the guy driving the truck. All this was happening as we are going about a hundred miles an hour and trying to dodge the craters in the road.

And the hotel we had to stay in overnight in Osogbo?

Oh dear lord in heaven.

The only thing you can do in Nigeria is get drunk and hope you make it back to the airport in 1-2 pieces.
That's the kind of shit they don't want for me. I mean, they know I can handle it, I'm a fucken paddy, but they'd rather I didn't.
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  #19  
Old 18-10-2019, 01:21 PM
Hordes'a'Fopperies Hordes'a'Fopperies is offline
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: In the Jungle, the mighty Jungle, the Langer sleeps toniiiiight!
Posts: 18,130
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lostmeringtopaddypow er View Post
The only thing you can do in Nigeria is get drunk and hope you make it back to the airport in 1-2 pieces.
Try PNG, padawan...

And you can get kidnapped in Nigeria as well... Fortunately, I've been luckly, but I know four or five guys who've been held ransom...
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Originally Posted by oul'doll View Post
I think we'd all like to see Micks bits.

Or anyone's bits really. I'd just like to see some bits.
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  #20  
Old 18-10-2019, 02:07 PM
Bennyton Bennyton is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Turners Cross
Posts: 4,438
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Drucker View Post
Pics of the label or GTFO

(welcome back by the way, I missed your erudite contributions especially in the context of "the board has gone to shite," etc.)
repped.
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Flew in to Cork Monday morning in the wind, rain and fog. He landed 2nd time around, and even though it was sky/ground/sky/ground out the window for the last 20 seconds he met it bang on in fairness.
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