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Old 09-02-2018, 09:39 PM
Duffs Duffs is offline
 
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One for the Snowflakes on here:-


During a dull White House dinner, Melania Trump leaned over to chat with Secretary of State, Tillerson. "I bought Donald a parrot for his birthday.

​That bird is so smart, Donald has already taught him to say over two hundred words! "Very impressive," said Tillerson, "but, you do realize he just speaks the words.. He doesn't really understand what they all mean.”

"Oh, I know", replied Melania, “but neither does the parrot."
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  #1652  
Old 23-02-2018, 04:56 PM
Duffs Duffs is offline
 
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"As good as this bar is," said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place called McTavish's.... The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink."

"Well, Angus," said the Englishman, "At my local in London, the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two."

"Ahhh, dat's nothin'," said Paddy, the Irishman. "Back home in me favorite pub in Galway, the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see dat you get laid, all on the house!"

The Englishman and Scotsman were suspicious of the claims.
"Did this actually happen to you?"

"Not me-self, personally, no," admitted the Irishman, "but it did happen to me sister quite a few times.
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  #1653  
Old Yesterday, 12:32 AM
Lee Bushwacker Lee Bushwacker is offline
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Ireland and Europe
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duffs View Post
"As good as this bar is," said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place called McTavish's.... The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink."

"Well, Angus," said the Englishman, "At my local in London, the Red Lion, the barman will buy you your third drink after you buy the first two."

"Ahhh, dat's nothin'," said Paddy, the Irishman. "Back home in me favorite pub in Galway, the moment you set foot in the place, they'll buy you a drink, then another, all the drinks you like, actually. Then, when you've had enough drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see dat you get laid, all on the house!"

The Englishman and Scotsman were suspicious of the claims.
"Did this actually happen to you?"

"Not me-self, personally, no," admitted the Irishman, "but it did happen to me sister quite a few times.
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