Books by the bedside?

[northmallexile]

Ok, so you've pulled. And you're going back to his/her place for the first time. While your soon-to-be love partner freshens up, you take the opportunity to leaf through the books beside the bed. What book would be most likely to send you running out of the place screaming, "I cannot sleep with this weirdo"?

This question was in part inspired by the Lolita discussion elsewhere. Can only imagine that having that beside the bed would inspire a raised eyebrow at the very least.

[corkmanc]

The complete collection of Harry Potter books would do it for me.

[Gobadán]

American Psycho?

[northmallexile]

Incidentally, what books do ye have beside your beds at the moment and we can rate them in terms of sexual turn-off?

I've got 'Down and Out in Paris and London', which I don't think should cause any major problems.

[BagaTaytos]

1) Candida - All your questions answered.
2) Sex for Dummies
3) Where's Wally annual 2004

[Del]

If she was good looking and up for it I really couldn't give a toss what books are by her bed!

[skipping girl]

to be honest any kinda book by the bed would do it for me, a man who reads is a huge turn on.

[goosed]

whn i were a young salesman i used to pick up hitchhikers , when they'd get in i'd ask them their name , then i'd lock the door and say "i think ill call you number 12" always amused me

[nedthescut]

whn i were a young salesman i used to pick up hitchhikers , when they'd get in i'd ask them their name , then i'd lock the door and say i think ill call you number 12" always amused me


Freak.

[Idaly1]

"How to eviscerate and eat unsuspecting one-night-standers" would set alarm bells off. As would a collection of those godawful "how to improve yourself because everything abut you sucks and you're willing to buy these books because your already shattered self-esteem is ripe for manipulation by an unqualified crank" books or anything along the lines of "Women Are From Venus Men Are From Mars" or whatever the fuck it is.

I actually read that book recently...well I flicked through it, for any of you who know me, a bit of the horse bolting with the milk stable spilt, but some of the stuff was/is interesting...

[northmallexile]

to be honest any kinda book by the bed would do it for me, a man who reads is a huge turn on.

Groovy.

Y'see, this is the problem with living in academic ivory tower type things. Everyone reads hugely, does it for a living in fact, so it's no big deal.

[Idaly1]

[QUOTE=Scipio Africanus]Right then Idaly, you're off my list of people whose beds I'll get into.

I mean...er...

....but I'll know how to "grow with you" and "keep us nourished"

[Trapped In A Box]

I think anything along the lines of Charles Mansons autobiography, The Catcher in the Rye (dunno whats the story with that book, but it's supposed to b freaky) and a copy of cannibal weekly.

Oh and porn by the bed, never good.

[thread_killer]

I think anything along the lines of Charles Mansons autobiography, The Catcher in the Rye (dunno whats the story with that book, but it's supposed to b freaky) and a copy of cannibal weekly.

Oh and porn by the bed, never good.


turns out, most of our ancestors would have been canibals. and we genetically inherited resistence to prion diseases as a result.

don't knock it 'till you've tried it.

[Trapped In A Box]

I meant for fellas with porn by the bed, but to go with what u sed. What if this girl had really really hard core porn? I'm talking plastic bags over the head. Cutting the partner (you), male penetration, whips and chains, not in a kinki way. What wud u do????

[BagaTaytos]

I meant for fellas with porn by the bed, but to go with what u sed. What if this girl had really really hard core porn? I'm talking plastic bags over the head. Cutting the partner (you), male penetration, whips and chains, not in a kinki way. What wud u do????

What would I do?....I'd definitely use plenty of lubrication....

[watermelon]

I have to agree with Scipio about self-help books on the night stand.
It just screams Loser.

[Idaly1]

I have to agree with Scipio about self-help books on the night stand.
It just screams Loser.

not by my bedside...it's in my library next to, how to be a millionaire in 6 easy steps, dating for assasins, my other car IS a porsche, IT is not as hard as IT seems, how to build the house of your dreams with 11€...

[watermelon]

not by my bedside...it's in my library next to, how to be a millionaire in 6 easy steps, dating for assasins, my other car IS a porsche, IT is not as hard as IT seems, how to build the house of your dreams with 11€...
So Idaly we have concluded that you are broke ( building cheap house, driving shit box), know nothing about computers, part time assasin with no love life.

What a loser. This even beats Naff and thats hard to do like.

[northmallexile]

So Idaly we have concluded that you are broke ( building cheap house, driving shit box), know nothing about computers, part time assasin with no love life.

What a loser. This even beats Naff and thats hard to do like.

And yet, he has a room in his house that he describes as a 'library'. Odd that.

[skipping girl]

And yet, he has a room in his house that he describes as a 'library'. Odd that.

a fiver says the library is actually the jacks with a few books resting on the side of the bath

[watermelon]

And yet, he has a room in his house that he describes as a 'library'. Odd that.
Mutton, lamb. You get the rest.

[northmallexile]

a fiver says the library is actually the jacks with a few books resting on the side of the bath

Ah yeah, you could be right.

But books rather than old copies of the Readers' Digest - not scraping rock bottom just yet.

[Pythagoras]

Incidentally, what books do ye have beside your beds at the moment and we can rate them in terms of sexual turn-off?

I've got 'Down and Out in Paris and London', which I don't think should cause any major problems.
I've got:

1. Dreamweaver MX: PHP Web Development
2. Beginning PHP

[Idaly1]

Mutton, lamb. You get the rest.

You dressed up for the night ?

[nedthescut]

I've got:

1. Dreamweaver MX: PHP Web Development
2. Beginning PHP


Stud.

[Idaly1]

So Idaly we have concluded that you are broke ( building cheap house, driving shit box), know nothing about computers, part time assasin with no love life.

What a loser. This even beats Naff and thats hard to do like.

yes to all of the above...I am only on lesson 4 of the millionaire book so fingers X'd......

[BagaTaytos]

I've got:

1. Dreamweaver MX: PHP Web Development
2. Beginning PHP

I bet you have no trouble falling asleep Py?

[watermelon]

Low blow Iday but I guess I asked for that one.

I'm with Ned on the 'Stud' comment Py. Seriously no trouble falling asleep but plenty pulling chicks.

[Pythagoras]

Low blow Iday but I guess I asked for that one.

I'm with Ned on the 'Stud' comment Py. Seriously no trouble falling asleep but plenty pulling chicks.
No trouble at all and if I do, there's "Logic in Computer Science" on the bookshelf ;)

[Idaly1]

that's very gracious of you Watermelon...

[nedthescut]

No trouble at all and if I do, there's "Logic in Computer Science" on the bookshelf ;)


ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Pythagoras]

ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Well that's one of you asleep already ;)

[nedthescut]

Well that's one of you asleep already ;)


Charming. :)

[Pythagoras]

Charming. :)
What woke you? ;)

[Charles De Gowl]

Hmmm beside the cot De Gowl you'll currently find The Third Policeman by that Flann O'Brien, Men Without Women by Ernest Hemingway, Birdsong by Sebastian Faulks, and bits of yesterdays sunday times and other sundry items of clothing, glasses of water etc. in fact the whole room somewhat resembles one of those old clothes/junk warehouses that one used find down the coal quay.

[northmallexile]

Men Without Women ... how very apt.

[watermelon]

I am reading White Teeth by Zadie Smith.
Also I have the entire contents of the Times scattered around the room.

[Charles De Gowl]

Men Without Women ... how very apt.
Disturbingly so.................. .......twas given to me by an ex girlfriend an all, think she might have been trying to tell me something???? Eh?

[Hoora II]

I am reading White Teeth by Zadie Smith.
Also I have the entire contents of the Times scattered around the room.

It's an enjoyable read but the similar "The Buddha of Surbubia" is much better. I was reading the biography of Hitler by Ian Kershaw recently and it was on the bedside locker. Brought a bird back one night and just managed to knock it off the locker and kick it under the bed before she saw it. Not the kind of message you want to send out...

btw i am interested in history and the psychology of such an obviously disturbed individual (before people start calling me a nazi)

[northmallexile]

It's an enjoyable read but the similar "The Buddha of Surbubia" is much better. I was reading the biography of Hitler by Ian Kershaw recently and it was on the bedside locker. Brought a bird back one night and just managed to knock it off the locker and kick it under the bed before she saw it. Not the kind of message you want to send out...

btw i am interested in history and the psychology of such an obviously disturbed individual (before people start calling me a nazi)

Noticed Mein Kampf on a girl's bookshelf once. Thought it best not to mention it.

[macuísle]

The Glorious Tradition, The story of the Orange Order.
Actually saw that in a "friend's" house. But I wasn't gonna do him anyways.


I checked into a B&B in Enniskillen one time and in my bedroom there was the biography of Winston Churchill, Edward Carson, William of Orange and the "True" Story of the Black and Tans. Didn't sleep much that night but, in fairness, the woman who ran the place was very nice for a hun.

[corkmanc]

Noticed Mein Kampf on a girl's bookshelf once. Thought it best not to mention it.
I was seeing a girl who got upset that I was reading Andrea Dworkin. Am the only man in history for getting shit from a woman for reading a feminist book?

[corkmanc]

The Glorious Tradition, The story of the Orange Order.
Actually saw that in a "friend's" house. But I wasn't gonna do him anyways.


I checked into a B&B in Enniskillen one time and in my bedroom there was the biography of Winston Churchill, Edward Carson, William of Orange and the "True" Story of the Black and Tans. Didn't sleep much that night but, in fairness, the woman who ran the place was very nice for a hun.
Now when you say "do" him is that in the biblical or republican sense?

[Charles De Gowl]

Now when you say "do" him is that in the biblical or republican sense?
or the hairstylist sense perhaps!

[macuísle]

Now when you say "do" him is that in the biblical or republican sense?


Now this is the kind of humour I'm talking about!

I meant I wasn't going to have sex with him. I can't shoot anyone since I dropped my Cloch in Bantry Bay offloading poitin.

[The Unholy Hypocrite]

Next to my bed, i have the Century photo book, which has become a permanent fixture there. Anne Rice's new book, Eats, shoots and leaves and a few others i haven't put in my cupboard yet.

[Gobadán]

I meant for fellas with porn by the bed, but to go with what u sed. What if this girl had really really hard core porn? I'm talking plastic bags over the head. Cutting the partner (you), male penetration, whips and chains, not in a kinki way. What wud u do????
That would be upsetting, especially golden and scat showers...

[northmallexile]

This thread is worth resurrecting...

For the record, I've currently got 'At Swim-Two-Birds' by Flann O'Brien, and the Odyssey as well as one of those counterfactual history books by my bedside.

So, would you?

[sunbabe08]

er i have all golf books at my bed side :o

[willow]

chicken soup for the teenage soul

[northmallexile]

chicken soup for the teenage soul

As someone with two degrees in psychology, can I just cringe quietly in the corner?

Seriously, self-help books often do a lot more harm than good. Go carefully.

[willow]

i like the stories in the book

[Trapped In A Box]

I wouldn't call the Chicken Soup books self help, they are exactly what they're called, good for the soul.

I have the teenage one too.

[El Che]

The Communist manifesto
The Motorcycle Diaries

[Loftydog]

I think i have please kill me by my bed at the moment. Fab book.

[MachinadeBizarre]

i suppose seeing the bible next to someones bed would have me running for the hills. also the Marquis De Sade might make me wonder....

[wunhunglo]

Can only imagine that having that beside the bed would inspire a raised eyebrow at the very least.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.....like fawk it does. I saw this and jumped straight into the taxi...from the third floor.
http://www.acuneeds.com/books/images/XIU01.gif

[Langer Dan]

schoolbooks, that'd have me running for the hills!:)

[craftyboy]

An apple a day keeps the doctor away.....like fawk it does. I saw this and jumped straight into the taxi...from the third floor.
http://www.acuneeds.com/books/images/XIU01.gif

lol

trying to think of a worse book to find, but i think that's Top Of The Pops

[wunhunglo]

I don't know about that.
http://www.epinions.com/images/opti/44/e0/0060959193-books-resized200.jpg

[Nicewanbiy]

I meant for fellas with porn by the bed, but to go with what u sed. What if this girl had really really hard core porn? I'm talking plastic bags over the head. Cutting the partner (you), male penetration, whips and chains, not in a kinki way. What wud u do????
I would lay back - crack open the popcorn and await violation!Woo Hoo fucking nice wan a beure taking control

As in the books personally im reading
1. Fatherland(Nazi thingie)
2. Da vinci code
3. a million little pieces(Drug addicts memoirs)
So i reckon she'd hit the floor running at fatherland

*Sob*
*Sigh*

[Trapped In A Box]

I think this would be a bit of a turn off

http://www.minimum.com/images/02805.gif

[Nicewanbiy]

I think this would be a bit of a turn off

http://www.minimum.com/images/02805.gif
i wouldnt be knocking it till you've tried it Trapped!

[Langer Dan]

ugh Golden Showers, mank!
who gets their jollies by being peed on???
twisted.

[Trapped In A Box]

ugh Golden Showers, mank!
who gets their jollies by being peed on???
twisted.
Evidently NWB. Too far Nicewan, too far.

*shudder*

[Nicewanbiy]

Evidently NWB. Too far Nicewan, too far.

*shudder*
ITS NEVER too far people... NEVER!
If it takes each and everyone of you on the board to be showered with gold god damn it i'll piddle on the lota ye lol

[Langer Dan]

era tis alright NWB save ur piddle for ur special someone:)

[Nicewanbiy]

era tis alright NWB save ur piddle for ur special someone:)
Sharing is caring biy
http://www.blanketmall.com/ProdImages/nw-031carebears-rainbow.gif

[Langer Dan]

Sharing is caring biy
http://www.blanketmall.com/ProdImages/nw-031carebears-rainbow.gif

they shoulda just changed their names to the wafty bears and be done with it!

[Nicewanbiy]

Fucking check out the irish wan like.....
http://www.angelfire.com/ok2/BearzArt/images/CBLine.jpg

[sunbabe08]

ugh Golden Showers, mank!
who gets their jollies by being peed on???
twisted.



they are out there. ugh but it's a sick idea it really is *puke*

[northmallexile]

Seeing as we're reviving book threads.

White Teeth by Zadie Smith. Would you throw on your clothes and flee?

[Newromancer]

American Psycho?

Hey!! I once got that one on my bed side.


So what would make me run then ... hmmm ... a few books from Barbara Cartland, Amanda Quick and Fabio would do the trick.

[Nicewanbiy]

Ok, so you've pulled. And you're going back to his/her place for the first time. While your soon-to-be love partner freshens up, you take the opportunity to leaf through the books beside the bed.

What book would be most likely to send you running out of the place screaming, "I cannot sleep with this weirdo"?

This question was in part inspired by the Lolita discussion elsewhere. Can only imagine that having that beside the bed would inspire a raised eyebrow at the very least.
Misery.

[oul'doll]

Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.

[oul'doll]

The Catcher in the Rye (dunno whats the story with that book, but it's supposed to b freaky)


Thats actually an excellent book and you shouldn't be so taken in by sensationalism.

[Nicewanbiy]

'Tis.

"Mapping Human History"

"Song and Dance Man - The Music of Bob Dylan"

"A New History of the Third Reich"

"The President of Good and Evil - taking George Bush seriously"

"Mr Silly's Bumper Pop-Up Book of Bedtime Stories"

"Young Lusty Sluts Vol. II"

I wonder which one I'll read tonight...
Whats wrong with the lusty sluts?

[ubernerd]

Thats actually an excellent book and you shouldn't be so taken in by sensationalism.

Absolutely nothing freaky about it either - where did that come from ? The Lennon assasin connection maybe (or was it Kennedy ? - cant remember.)

Its one you could read in a couple of sittings.

Books that would make me think twice:
Any thing by Bertie's young wan or her ilk.
That "The Rules" thing.

Book that would intrigue:
The Dice Man*


*Would open up a world of possibilities.

[Carmona]

The complete collection of Harry Potter books would do it for me.
1,000% agreement. I wouldn't be able to act it out.

[Carmona]

This thread is worth resurrecting...

For the record, I've currently got 'At Swim-Two-Birds' by Flann O'Brien, and the Odyssey as well as one of those counterfactual history books by my bedside.

So, would you?
Yeah I would. Just read a little extract from "At swim.. " this morning. So funny.

[DaisyM]

I've got "The Fabulous Girl's Guide to Decorum"* and "Dictionary of Dreams" by my bed at the moment...says a lot about me really - bit of a girl. Which is handy, seeing as I'm female.*actually not a self help, but an entertaining spin on modern life and the shite we're expected to put up with.

[Carmona]

I've got "The Fabulous Girl's Guide to Decorum"* and "Dictionary of Dreams" by my bed at the moment...says a lot about me really - bit of a girl. Which is handy, seeing as I'm female.*actually not a self help, but an entertaining spin on modern life and the shite we're expected to put up with.
A girl guides' book. Fuckin kinky or what.

[DaisyM]

A girl guides' book. Fuckin kinky or what.

It's about fabulous girl guides though, you know, imagine the SATC girls kitted up and going camping, how to muck in for survival without breaking a french nail.

[ROXY]

William Wall's 'This is the Country'. Get it. Read it.

[The Full Ham]

"Lies and the lying liars who tell them...a fair and balanced look at the right"
Al Franken

"New Rules" Bill Maher

"What we do now" a collection of essays in post '04 America.

"blackwood Farm" Anne Rice

"Ireland" Frank Delaney

"Morningstar" David Gemmel outstanding read...al his stuff is.

[Superior]

Ian McEwan Atonement


I can't think of a single book
that would send me scurrying
for the hills.

The bed-wetting & schizo titles aside.
Well, maybe not the schizo one.

And I think anyone who says different
is a liar. Pants on fire!

"Actually, I'm afraid, perusing your
collection of books — Bravo Two Zero by
Andy McNab, PS, I love You by Cecilia Ahern,
Dianetics by L Ron Hubbard, and The DaVinci
Code by Dan Brown — I see that I can no
longer sleep with you. Good night."

Nonsense!

[gregson1]

Nada..... I can't read....

[exileonpatrickstreet]

... I can't shoot anyone since I dropped my Cloch in Bantry Bay offloading poitin.
glock, you gome, glock

cloch? chicks these days...

[northmallexile]

This (http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/books/2007/05/pillow_books.html) reminded me of this thread.

I've currently got Howard's End by E.M. Forster.

[Professor Piehead]

The joy of sex.

[northmallexile]

The joy of sex.

Is what you've got at the moment, or is what would turn you off?

[Matlock]

Currently i have Louix Theroux's "The call of the weird" and Stephen Martin's "Rock and a hard place".

I have no idea what this says about me.

[jungle]

Currently i have Louix Theroux's "The call of the wierd" and Stephen Martin's "Rock and a hard place".

I have no idea what this says about me.

That you can't spell weird ;-)

[Tube a Pringles]

Currently i have Louix Theroux's "The call of the wierd" and Stephen Martin's "Rock and a hard place".

I have no idea what this says about me.


Fnarrr!

[BaconChiliBurger]

Fall of Hyperion - Dan Simmons
100 greatest thinkers - don't remember the author

[Matlock]

That you can't spell weird ;-)

Ha fecking ha.

Tis true though, tis one of those words that i always spell wrong.

[Professor Piehead]

Is what you've got at the moment, or is what would turn you off?

That book young man is a revelation.

[Tube a Pringles]

That book young man is a revelation.

Ah, most of us don't need an instruction manual.......

[Matlock]

Ah, most of us don't need an instruction manual.......

Actually most of ye do ;-)

[Tube a Pringles]

Actually most of ye do ;-)

.........hang on there a second, let me refer to the book....


*turns to index*

Is Clitoris with a "C" or a "K"...?


*grunt*


*shuffle*



*Splurt*


Oh, sorry about that. Let me get a tissue.


How was it for you?

[Professor Piehead]

Ah, most of us don't need an instruction manual.......

I would give you a lend if all the pages wern't stuck together.

[Professor Piehead]

.........hang on there a second, let me refer to the book....


*turns to index*

Is Clitoris with a "C" or a "K"...?


*grunt*


*shuffle*



*Splurt*


Oh, sorry about that. Let me get a tissue.


How was it for you?

Heh heh, class.:)

[Matlock]

.........hang on there a second, let me refer to the book....


*turns to index*

Is Clitoris with a "C" or a "K"...?


*grunt*


*shuffle*



*Splurt*


Oh, sorry about that. Let me get a tissue.


How was it for you?

*turns off bedside light*

*turns back on wookie*

That answer your question?

[Tube a Pringles]

*turns off bedside light*

*turns back on wookie*

That answer your question?


*snore*





*snore*






*snore*

[Matlock]

*snore*





*snore*






*snore*

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Fecking classic!

[Claire.h]

I'm reading The Troublesome Offspring of Cardinal Guzman
by Louis De Bernieres (http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/203-7753717-2247147?%5Fencoding= UTF8&search-type=ss&index=books-uk&field-author=Louis%20De%20 Bernieres).
This makes me sexy.

[HappyMonday83]

I suppose if any book would send me running it would be the bible. I'd know I was barking up the wrong tree.

[Professor Piehead]

I suppose if any book would send me running it would be the bible. I'd know I was barking up the wrong tree.

No boy, those christians are hot to trot.

[HappyMonday83]

No boy, those christians are hot to trot.

Yeah but would you get the ride off a devout catholic.

[Hochma]

I used to keep a bible in my bedside locker ... that was a while back now though ...

[Hochma]

And there is a big one we used to have for the family ... sometimes I used to take it out and look at the lovely pictures in it ...

[Professor Piehead]

Yeah but would you get the ride off a devout catholic.

Once they are asleep, yes.

[Vendredi]

I always figure out if the books are there because the person actually reads them or if they are there as part of an interior design plot.

If a woman in her mid thirties has some home interior mag on display in the sitting room, a 30something mag by the bed, assorted by one of the 3 for 2 or bestseller from Waterstones, I run.

and yes, it does happen.

[trasnanadtonnta]

Yeah but would you get the ride off a devout catholic.

Pffh. Catholics don't read the Bible. We have people to do that for us.

As usual, I have a hefty stack of books by the bed.

I have, in order from bottom of the pile to top:

The Final Solution by Michael Chabon
Down and Out in Paris and London
Lord of the Rings
Sushi For Beginners by Marian Keyes
Woody Allen's complete prose
Kant's Critique of Practical Reason
Vita Brevis by Jostein Gaarder
The new Vanity Fair is perched preacariously atop the pile.

The contents of this post constitute what I estimate to be reason no. 5,453 why Trasna rarely gets any.

Perhaps not unrelatedly, there is no book that would put me off. I read shite for relaxation purposes, if it has good dirty bits, or just to see what the fuss is about. Perhaps others do the same.

[Carmona]

Pffh. Catholics don't read the Bible. We have people to do that for us.

As usual, I have a hefty stack of books by the bed.

I have, in order from bottom of the pile to top:

The Final Solution by Michael Chabon
Down and Out in Paris and London
Lord of the Rings
Sushi For Beginners by Marian Keyes
Woody Allen's complete prose
Kant's Critique of Practical Reason
Vita Brevis by Jostein Gaarder
The new Vanity Fair is perched preacariously atop the pile.

The contents of this post constitute what I estimate to be reason no. 5,453 why Trasna rarely gets any.

Perhaps not unrelatedly, there is no book that would put me off. I read shite for relaxation purposes, if it has good dirty bits, or just to see what the fuss is about. Perhaps others do the same.

There's a NEW Vanity Fair! Is Becky Sharpe less of a bitch? As for Dining out in Paris and London, well we've got the Rough Guide now, yeah?

[wat_boy]

ive started to read the hobbit again, class story!

[trasnanadtonnta]

There's a NEW Vanity Fair! Is Becky Sharpe less of a bitch? As for Dining out in Paris and London, well we've got the Rough Guide now, yeah?

*Sigh*

If only I had your looks, charm and lightning wit, Carm.

[Carmona]

*Sigh*

If only I had your looks, charm and lightning wit, Carm.

Hey, enough of that sarky shit, eh. I thought we eversoslightlyhigher thanchildmolesters were supposed to stick together.

[trasnanadtonnta]

Hey, enough of that sarky shit, eh. I thought we eversoslightlyhigher thanchildmolesters were supposed to stick together.

I guess my playful teasing thing just has too many layers to be conveyed in typing. It's a hard knock life, hah?

[BaconChiliBurger]

The Final Solution by Michael Chabon
Down and Out in Paris and London
Lord of the Rings
Sushi For Beginners by Marian Keyes
Woody Allen's complete prose
Kant's Critique of Practical Reason
Vita Brevis by Jostein Gaarder
The new Vanity Fair is perched preacariously atop the pile.

.

christ dudette, any potential suitor would be intimitated by that

[William Underhill Malice]

Pffh. Catholics don't read the Bible. We have people to do that for us.

As usual, I have a hefty stack of books by the bed.

I have, in order from bottom of the pile to top:

The Final Solution by Michael Chabon
Down and Out in Paris and London
Lord of the Rings
Sushi For Beginners by Marian Keyes
Woody Allen's complete prose
Kant's Critique of Practical Reason
Vita Brevis by Jostein Gaarder
The new Vanity Fair is perched preacariously atop the pile.

The contents of this post constitute what I estimate to be reason no. 5,453 why Trasna rarely gets any.

Perhaps not unrelatedly, there is no book that would put me off. I read shite for relaxation purposes, if it has good dirty bits, or just to see what the fuss is about. Perhaps others do the same.


I like your choice. I reckon a lot of people are listing books they like people to think their reading. Me, I love a good decent thriller, Stephen king, Stephen Hunter, John Grisham etc. none of this fairy dancing swans on moonlit water shite.

Anyone who says they have read Ulysses may be telling the truth. Enjoying it is a diffferent story. Life is too short to be spend reading pretenious wank for the sake of it.

I don't want to take from anyone whos posted a favourite book with a worthy bent but the amount of shite books that people claim to have read leads me to claim FRAUD

[Claire.h]

Ooh I love Stephen King. He's written some shite (The Cell), but when he's on form, he's masterful. Not so much the unreal scary stuff (although I enjoy that too), but the books looking at the ugly, dark side of humanity . Eg: The Running Man {which is apparently a shit film} was about "a desperate, average man in a harsh, cynical corporate-controlled world running for his life" and a bit eerie when you look at today's vicious reality tv.
And yet there is still a great warmth in his writing; many of his characters are driven by love for family or friends.
There's the fear and disgust at the mass of humanity, and the love and devotion for individual representations of it, so there's always hope. :)

And stuff that has creeped me out much as I try to forget it. I still get a bit freaked out by the drain in sinks.

[trasnanadtonnta]

Let me say for the record I was not reading Kant for fun. I was picking out bits for teaching purposes, which I happened to do in bed.

[northmallexile]

Let me say for the record I was not reading Kant for fun. I was picking out bits for teaching purposes, which I happened to do in bed.

You teach in bed?

Well, fair enough, I suppose...

[trasnanadtonnta]

You teach in bed?

Well, fair enough, I suppose...

Hey, you have to keep the kids interested somehow, and in today's gratification-driven culture...

[Persephone]

i finally finished the english patient after 4 years

[trasnanadtonnta]

i finally finished the english patient after 4 years

What did you do with the body?

[Persephone]

What did you do with the body?

*GASP*

i expected better of you Trasna

*shakes head*

[trasnanadtonnta]

i expected better of you Trasna

Did you? Why? Your optimism is a beacon before us all, Perse!

[Persephone]

Did you? Why? Your optimism is a beacon before us all, Perse!

*points* OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT?

*runs out of thread*

[whos askin boi]

id have to say a beano would rattle me!

[trasnanadtonnta]

id have to say a beano would rattle me!

Why? The Beano is brilliant! Or it was the last time I read it, which was admittedly about fifteen years ago.

[Claire.h]

Why? The Beano is brilliant! Or it was the last time I read it, which was admittedly about fifteen years ago.
whos askin boi was three years old at the time.
:agedface:

[trasnanadtonnta]

whos askin boi was three years old at the time.
:agedface:

Jaysus. That puts the cat among the grey oul pigeons alright, doesn't it?

[whos askin boi]

Why? The Beano is brilliant! Or it was the last time I read it, which was admittedly about fifteen years ago.

i don't know why it would! it just would :D or else a book of slyvia plaths poetry!

[trasnanadtonnta]

a book of slyvia plaths poetry!

That, I could understand.

[northmallexile]

jd26's thread reminded me of this. I've got J.P. Donleavy's 'The Ginger Man' and 'Hurling: The Revolution Years' by my bedside. I'm trying to imagine a girl who'd be turned on by that combination and not quite succeeding.

[Ciotóg]

jd26's thread reminded me of this. I've got J.P. Donleavy's 'The Ginger Man' and 'Hurling: The Revolution Years' by my bedside. I'm trying to imagine a girl who'd be turned on by that combination and not quite succeeding.

http://www.jamesgalvin.net/images/john_mullane.jpg

[northmallexile]

http://www.jamesgalvin.net/images/john_mullane.jpg

Christ. That's my libido wrecked till May at least.

[Downward Facing God]

I'm reading The Troublesome Offspring of Cardinal Guzman
by Louis De Bernieres (http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/203-7753717-2247147?%5Fencoding= UTF8&search-type=ss&index=books-uk&field-author=Louis%20De%20 Bernieres).
This makes me sexy.

I love that book. (Senior Vivo is better though).

[Matlock]

Currently by my bedside there are

Paul McGrath's boigraphy
A Kathy Lette book, the name of which escapes me
Rumpole and the angel of death" John Mortimor.

[pudgee]

Currently by my bedside there are

Paul McGrath's boigraphy
A Kathy Lette book, the name of which escapes me
Rumpole and the angel of death" John Mortimor.

Oh christ

[Langer Dan]

The great gatsby.
October surprise.
a slender thread.

[Matlock]

Oh christ

I thought "Foetal attraction" and "Girls night out" were both funny, in a chick lit sort of way.

The one that currently lounges by my bedside was crap though.

[pudgee]

I thought "Foetal attraction" and "Girls night out" were both funny, in a chick lit sort of way.

The one that currently lounges by my bedside was crap though.

Never read her stuff. Judging by her public persona, I'd have more fun with Mein Kampf.

[Langer Dan]

Never read her stuff. Judging by her public persona, I'd have more fun with Mein Kampf.

Cracking read!

I return to it every so often.

[trasnanadtonnta]

I have:

An Order For Murder by Susanna Gregory
Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Philosophy (various authors)
The Twilight Zone: Cultural Imagery from Plato to O.J. by Susan Bordo
Unbearable Weight:Feminism, Western Culture and the Body, by Susan Bordo
What is the what? By Dave Eggers
The Cambridge Companion to Plato (various)

I will never be kissed again, will I? *sigh*

[Langer Dan]

I have:

An Order For Murder by Susanna Gregory
Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Philosophy (various authors)
The Twilight Zone: Cultural Imagery from Plato to O.J. by Susan Bordo
Unbearable Weight:Feminism, Western Culture and the Body, by Susan Bordo
What is the what? By Dave Eggers
The Cambridge Companion to Plato (various)

I will never be kissed again, will I? *sigh*

ah yer not serious?:(

Jesus, theyl publish anything these days....
So how do they explain 'Once more with feeling'?;)

[Matlock]

ah yer not serious?:(

Jesus, theyl publish anything these days....
So how do they explain 'Once more with feeling'?;)

It is the best episode of Buffy EVER

It needs no further explaination!

[trasnanadtonnta]

ah yer not serious?:(

Jesus, theyl publish anything these days....
So how do they explain 'Once more with feeling'?;)

It's an excellent book, written by some respected names. Edited, as it happens, by the head of my department who is a very serious scholar of medieval philosophy as well as being interested in philosophical themes in popular culture.

The goal isn't to 'explain' any particular episode, though. It's not a Buffy book, it's a philosophical-themes-in-Buffy book.

I loved that episode, for the record, but I don't think it's the best ever.

[Langer Dan]

I sense a trendy scholar crush?:)

Ah buffy was a legendary show, they should have wrapped it up after she was killed off tho..

I think the Dawn to Quality episodes had a directly inverse ratio.

[Lamps]

Buffy was awful stuff altogether.

Ye're a pity. I expect it from you Fitzy, but Trasna?

[Langer Dan]

Ah gway and watch the rugger, ya pale shadow of yer former self.

This faded gunslinger routine after the fact just doesnt wash.

[trasnanadtonnta]

Buffy was awful stuff altogether.

Ye're a pity. I expect it from you Fitzy, but Trasna?

A little skinny, blonde girl kicks ass and destroys evil, ordering and bossing all round her in the process. With my brand of confrontational, angry feminism, how could I not love that?

[Synchronicity]

Any Woman's Blues - Erica Jong
Microserfs - Douglas Coupland
European City Breaks
Deep Simplicity - John Gribbin
Nausea - JP Sartre

I also have a copy of Cosmo and a copy of Physics World. It's the latter combination that confuses Mr Sync.

[Matlock]

Any Woman's Blues - Erica Jong
Microserfs - Douglas Coupland
European City Breaks
Deep Simplicity - John Gribbin
Nausea - JP Sartre

I also have a copy of Cosmo and a copy of Physics World. It's the latter combination that confuses Mr Sync.

I love that book.

Actually, bbc radio 3 did an adaptation of "Girlfriend in a coma" the other night. Didi anyone hear it?

[Lamps]

A little skinny, blonde girl kicks ass and destroys evil, ordering and bossing all round her in the process. With my brand of confrontational, angry feminism, how could I not love that?

sounds a bit kinky to me.

do you think it would have been successful with ugly betty leading the charge?

[Lamps]

Ah gway and watch the rugger, ya pale shadow of yer former self.

This faded gunslinger routine after the fact just doesnt wash.

I'm getting to admins to pull that thread.

[Langer Dan]

I'm getting to admins to pull that thread.

It's for the best really.

[Hang_Sandwich]

A little skinny, blonde girl kicks ass and destroys evil, ordering and bossing all round her in the process. With my brand of confrontational, angry feminism, how could I not love that?
the best part is where you see all that crumbling down in cruel intentions, the dirty filthy dirty tramp

[Langer Dan]

the best part is where you see all that crumbling down in cruel intentions, the dirty filthy dirty tramp

LMAO!!!!

Hang, you're some man....

[Hang_Sandwich]

LMAO!!!!

Hang, you're some man....

A horse of a man and not just in the trousers

[Chelsea Hotel #2]

No One Belongs Here More than You - Miranda July

Surely a clincher?

[Claire.h]

A little skinny, blonde girl kicks ass and destroys evil, ordering and bossing all round her in the process. With my brand of confrontational, angry feminism, how could I not love that?

Coincidently, at the time this post was being typed I was re-watching the first episode of the first series. I recently watched the last few series for the first time (I didn't watch them when they were broadcast because I had a life) and couldn't let the Buffyverse go at the finale.

My bedside now:
Toni Morrison - Beloved
Nicholas Bornoff - Pink Samurai (basically a history of sex in Japan)
Bill Bryson - A Short History of Nearly Everything
In my bag: Iain M.Banks - Excession
In the toilet: I Am, Therefore I think

[Langer Dan]

Coincidently, at the time this post was being typed I was re-watching the first episode of the first series. I recently watched the last few series for the first time (I didn't watch them when they were broadcast because I had a life) and couldn't let the Buffyverse go at the finale.

My bedside now:
Toni Morrison - Beloved
Nicholas Bornoff - Pink Samurai (basically a history of sex in Japan)
Bill Bryson - A Short History of Nearly Everything
In my bag: Iain M.Banks - Excession
In the toilet: I Am, Therefore I think

Is that the one in the hotel?

[BaconChiliBurger]

Coincidently, at the time this post was being typed I was re-watching the first episode of the first series. I recently watched the last few series for the first time (I didn't watch them when they were broadcast because I had a life) and couldn't let the Buffyverse go at the finale.

My bedside now:
Toni Morrison - Beloved
Nicholas Bornoff - Pink Samurai (basically a history of sex in Japan)
Bill Bryson - A Short History of Nearly Everything
In my bag: Iain M.Banks - Excession
In the toilet: I Am, Therefore I think

I liked that one.

[Claire.h]

Is that the one in the hotel?
No...

The book follows the story of Sethe (pronounced "Seth-uh") and her daughter Denver as they try to rebuild their lives after having escaped from slavery. One day, a young lady shows up at their house, saying that her name is "Beloved." Sethe comes to believe that the girl is another of her daughters, whom Sethe murdered by slitting her throat with a handsaw when she was only two years old to save her from a life of slavery, and whose tombstone reads "Beloved."

[Langer Dan]

No...

Must be 'love' then or I might be thinking of 'Sula'.
Come to think of it, tis 'Sula'.

tis a long time since I read Toni Morrison

[Matlock]

No...

Didnt Oprah make a film of that?

never saw it, but twas meant to be a turkey.

[Langer Dan]

Oprah is a traitor to feminism.

The stupid beeeyatch.

[Claire.h]

Wasn't that The Colour Purple?

[Matlock]

Wasn't that The Colour Purple?


http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120603/

Oprah was responsible for alot of the financing too afaik.

[trasnanadtonnta]

do you think it would have been successful with ugly betty leading the charge?

Of course not. What's your point?

I like Buffy because she's conventionally extremely attractive but she also derives a lot of her sexiness from her strength, rather than deriving her only strength from her sexiness, like most female characters on TV.

[Bennyton]

"A history of Cobh"

I'd be gone in a shot biy

[goosed]

Incidentally, what books do ye have beside your beds at the moment and we can rate them in terms of sexual turn-off?

I've got 'Down and Out in Paris and London', which I don't think should cause any major problems.

apart from being a crap book mmmm more bread and lard anyone

[northmallexile]

http://www.aaanything.net/wp-content/gallery/famous-people-quotes/we_need_to_make_book s_cool_again_if_you_ go_home_with_somebod y_and_they_dont_have _books_dont_fuck_the m_john_waters.jpg

[northmallexile]

I was 21 when I started this thread.

Twenty-one. Jesus.

[skybluebarry]

Some of the posters on could not read when this thread started.

[duishbag]

some of the people who posted on this thread could be dead by now,its that old

[Beaty]

Ok, so you've pulled. And you're going back to his/her place for the first time. While your soon-to-be love partner freshens up, you take the opportunity to leaf through the books beside the bed. What book would be most likely to send you running out of the place screaming, "I cannot sleep with this weirdo"?

This question was in part inspired by the Lolita discussion elsewhere. Can only imagine that having that beside the bed would inspire a raised eyebrow at the very least.

What the fuck?

Freshens up?

B

[Cook My Sock]

What the fuck?

Freshens up?

B

Gives their box a rub of a damp facecloth.

[Beaty]

Gives their box a rub of a damp facecloth.

Surely my wet balaclava would do that??

B

[tetrapak]

Ok, so you've pulled. And you're going back to his/her place for the first time. While your soon-to-be love partner freshens up, you take the opportunity to leaf through the books beside the bed. What book would be most likely to send you running out of the place screaming, "I cannot sleep with this weirdo"?

If she had "HOW TO GIVE THE ABSOLUTE PERFECT BLOWJOB" I might begin to wonder what an inspired choice I made

[Cook My Sock]

Surely my wet balaclava would do that??

B

So would my tongue.

[Beaty]

So would my tongue.

True, True.

B