Majority of People in Skibbereen Will Have Won Rowing Medals by 2025

Posted on May 29, 2017 in News

 
 



A new plan compiled by authorities in Skibbereen and seen by the PROC Investigation Unit estimates that most young men and women in the town will hold medals from major national and international rowing events by 2025.

Furthermore in thirty years time it is projected that the number of people from the town who have achieved a podium finish at the highest level in the sport will exceed the total number of people living in the town. And in fifty years time there will be more medals in the town than there are rowers in the world.

That’s the kind of upbeat yet realistic attitude to sport that we at the People’s Republic love to see. Let’s not aim too high, like!

Take last Sunday morning for example - an ordinary non-championship Sunday. While most of us were still in bed Mark O’Donovan and Shane O’Driscoll were winning Gold at the European Rowing Championships in the Czech Republic with Gary O’Donovan, Paul O’Donovan and Denise Walsh bagging silver medals shortly afterwards. Nothing out of the ordinary if you’re from Skibb of course – even the post-match interviews that went viral were just regular around-the-town banter.  

The sensational Skibb victories coupled with Cork City’s 4-1 humiliation of Shamrock Rovers on Friday night rounded off a great weekend of sport on Leeside – as long as you don’t mention the near-miss at the Fraher Field in Waterford on Saturday that could have been the worst result for Cork sport in the history of sport – and that includes when Gougane barra unexpectedly lost to the Kilmichael Kidnappers in the Division 1 Wife Stealing League of 1548 A.D. (they beat them later on in the championship by just one wife but it was the start of a major decline for that great team).

If you have been distracted by the medal haul and the drubbing of Shams at the Cross then maybe it’s best you stay in your Cork bubble and all that needs to be said is that Cork footballers will be there to play Tipperary in the Munster semi-final next Sunday week. Just about.

Oar to be a…oar to be a….Rebel!

 
10 reasons why Cork Jazz Festival is the best music festival in Ireland

10 reasons why Cork Jazz Festival is the best music festival in Ireland

No sleeping in tents, no worries about the weather, your car won't get stuck in the mud and best of all you don't even have to leave Cork...

Read More

Guide to Cork Jazz Festival for Musicians

Guide to Cork Jazz Festival for Musicians

If you're coming to Cork to show off your pentatonic scales, we're really looking forward to seeing you but don't forget to practice your banter and leave the jazz orgasm face at home...

Read More

PROC Guide to Builder’s Bluff

PROC Guide to Builder’s Bluff

The building boom is back. Are you a hospital consultant thinking of getting into attic conversions or the CEO of a Fortune 500 company that fancies a career in roofing? Then know how proper langers treat their customers....

Read More

Awkward Crime Statistics

Awkward Crime Statistics

In Europe's friendliest city more than one bicycle is stolen every..eh....several days. That's a whopping 0.05% of the population. Be careful out there....

Read More

Who else needs a Dinny funt?

Who else needs a Dinny funt?

An 83 year old man foiled a three-man raid in Glanmire last Saturday evening and in the process delivered a beautiful kick up the arse to one of the humiliated raiders. Who else needs a Dinny Funt?

Read More

 
 

Advertising